Choosing to lose?
This post may offend some folks because it will sound like I'm ticked off and that I think our church is better than everyone else's. Trust me...it's not and I'm not ticked. I just think we need to answer a few questions if we're going to make a difference that lasts.
So the question is "If younger generations (youth/young adults) can't stand going to church on Saturday/Sunday, does it really work in the long run to start up a separate ministry for them so that they will enjoy learning about God? What happens once they graduate? Is the Sunday service still going to suck? Then what?"
I had a conversation with a youth pastor friend of mine (one of the guys going on a sabbatical) today and we didn't really get into it, but this was one of the questions that came up right as he was leaving the coffee shop. He's feeling a little burnt out with youth ministry and is basically restarting all over again which happens more frequently than we would like to admit. His frustration is that lots of the youth in his youth ministry don't go to church on Sunday because it's lame. He's contemplating starting a young adults thing for the same reason.
But my question is "Why?" What happens when they are too old for young adults and what happens on Sunday still sucks? Then what?
At the same time, my experience tells me that changing a church that is dead set in it's ways is next to impossible.
My answer to him: plant a church. Not out of rebellion or anger, but out of a desire to connect emerging generations to Jesus. Because the reality is that there aren't a whole lot of churches that are concerned with that. They are more concerned with doing what they've always done. If a young person can't handle it, they should learn some respect and deal with it.
The problem is that they are learning to deal with it...they just aren't coming. Period. So what do we do with that?
When we started TXC we tried our hardest to not be reactionary and not birth out of what we weren't going to be. Instead we actively tried to focus on what we would be. That's a hard thing to do and we haven't got it nailed down yet. The problem is that we do have to be a little bit reactionary just because of what has already happened. We also want to continue to be proactive so that we don't have to react in the future. Some of the ways we are trying to be proactive:
1. Because a lot of people who are disconnected from Jesus view church as Sunday morning, a lot of them will check out Sunday to get a feel for the church. We want Sunday to be good. Not too impress people, but because we don't want to be there either if it sucks! We want a 13 year old to walk out of the theatre saying that he connected with God, not "That sure was lame"
2. We are going to do our best to connect people together that are in the same generation but we definitely aren't planning on starting any age specific programs. Mainly because we don't think that we can do anything better than what we are already doing on Sunday. If a teen/young adult doesn't like what we do on Sunday, anything we start for them in competition with Sunday is definitely going to suck.
3. We have chosen to be progressive and change. A lot of times it can be easy to get stuck in doing things the same old way week in and week out. The problem is that emerging generations are used to change and it happens in our world every single day. We've chosen to embrace change and those that can't handle it will eventually leave and there is nothing we can do about that. Our music will change. Our look will change. Our style will change. Our intimate feel will change as we get bigger. We will change. Traditions and history are great to look back to and see where we've come from. But living there just doesn't make any sense.
4. We are trying to live out and communicate the fact that the collective gathering that takes place each week isn't what being a Christian is all about. Honestly, this is a challenge for me. I don't know if it's just my brain or what it is but it's very easy for me to default to "going to church" mode instead of "being the church". When we get so wrapped up in what happens at the gathering that it's what we live for, we're missing the mark. It's not that we can't be excited to get together...but that's what it should be about...being with the other people that are a part of our faith community. It shouldn't be about wondering what songs we're going to sing or what the "most holy preacher" is going to reveal from God's word or what he's going to be wearing or how many people are going to show up so that I feel better about myself. I think that the gathering should be about us as a collective faith community, looking back at what God did this last week and looking forward to what he's gonna do this coming week. Everything should point to that and if there's something stealing the show and causing us to focus on it rather than on what God is doing among us, there's a problem.
It's so easy to be the church and yet it can be extremely hard. Learning that I need to be in the middle of the world. I need to have friends (or at least be around people) that don't know Jesus. It helps me stay aware of what's really going on in the world and it creates a tension of trying to figure out how I can provocatively live my life in a way that shows something different. God's only plan to reveal himself to the world, after Jesus of course, was through the people called the church. The problem comes in when we stay huddled up in our fancy buildings with walls that are impossible to get through. Even when we don't have a church building we can get caught up in our little Christian ghetto because we're scared spitless that the Devil is gonna get us if we venture out into the world where real people live. It's as we live as if Jesus really was in us that people will see something they want. We won't even have to pick up our megaphones or walk around with our billboards anymore. Jesus is attractive. It's usually us that people don't like.
So the question is "If younger generations (youth/young adults) can't stand going to church on Saturday/Sunday, does it really work in the long run to start up a separate ministry for them so that they will enjoy learning about God? What happens once they graduate? Is the Sunday service still going to suck? Then what?"
I had a conversation with a youth pastor friend of mine (one of the guys going on a sabbatical) today and we didn't really get into it, but this was one of the questions that came up right as he was leaving the coffee shop. He's feeling a little burnt out with youth ministry and is basically restarting all over again which happens more frequently than we would like to admit. His frustration is that lots of the youth in his youth ministry don't go to church on Sunday because it's lame. He's contemplating starting a young adults thing for the same reason.
But my question is "Why?" What happens when they are too old for young adults and what happens on Sunday still sucks? Then what?
At the same time, my experience tells me that changing a church that is dead set in it's ways is next to impossible.
My answer to him: plant a church. Not out of rebellion or anger, but out of a desire to connect emerging generations to Jesus. Because the reality is that there aren't a whole lot of churches that are concerned with that. They are more concerned with doing what they've always done. If a young person can't handle it, they should learn some respect and deal with it.
The problem is that they are learning to deal with it...they just aren't coming. Period. So what do we do with that?
When we started TXC we tried our hardest to not be reactionary and not birth out of what we weren't going to be. Instead we actively tried to focus on what we would be. That's a hard thing to do and we haven't got it nailed down yet. The problem is that we do have to be a little bit reactionary just because of what has already happened. We also want to continue to be proactive so that we don't have to react in the future. Some of the ways we are trying to be proactive:
1. Because a lot of people who are disconnected from Jesus view church as Sunday morning, a lot of them will check out Sunday to get a feel for the church. We want Sunday to be good. Not too impress people, but because we don't want to be there either if it sucks! We want a 13 year old to walk out of the theatre saying that he connected with God, not "That sure was lame"
2. We are going to do our best to connect people together that are in the same generation but we definitely aren't planning on starting any age specific programs. Mainly because we don't think that we can do anything better than what we are already doing on Sunday. If a teen/young adult doesn't like what we do on Sunday, anything we start for them in competition with Sunday is definitely going to suck.
3. We have chosen to be progressive and change. A lot of times it can be easy to get stuck in doing things the same old way week in and week out. The problem is that emerging generations are used to change and it happens in our world every single day. We've chosen to embrace change and those that can't handle it will eventually leave and there is nothing we can do about that. Our music will change. Our look will change. Our style will change. Our intimate feel will change as we get bigger. We will change. Traditions and history are great to look back to and see where we've come from. But living there just doesn't make any sense.
4. We are trying to live out and communicate the fact that the collective gathering that takes place each week isn't what being a Christian is all about. Honestly, this is a challenge for me. I don't know if it's just my brain or what it is but it's very easy for me to default to "going to church" mode instead of "being the church". When we get so wrapped up in what happens at the gathering that it's what we live for, we're missing the mark. It's not that we can't be excited to get together...but that's what it should be about...being with the other people that are a part of our faith community. It shouldn't be about wondering what songs we're going to sing or what the "most holy preacher" is going to reveal from God's word or what he's going to be wearing or how many people are going to show up so that I feel better about myself. I think that the gathering should be about us as a collective faith community, looking back at what God did this last week and looking forward to what he's gonna do this coming week. Everything should point to that and if there's something stealing the show and causing us to focus on it rather than on what God is doing among us, there's a problem.
It's so easy to be the church and yet it can be extremely hard. Learning that I need to be in the middle of the world. I need to have friends (or at least be around people) that don't know Jesus. It helps me stay aware of what's really going on in the world and it creates a tension of trying to figure out how I can provocatively live my life in a way that shows something different. God's only plan to reveal himself to the world, after Jesus of course, was through the people called the church. The problem comes in when we stay huddled up in our fancy buildings with walls that are impossible to get through. Even when we don't have a church building we can get caught up in our little Christian ghetto because we're scared spitless that the Devil is gonna get us if we venture out into the world where real people live. It's as we live as if Jesus really was in us that people will see something they want. We won't even have to pick up our megaphones or walk around with our billboards anymore. Jesus is attractive. It's usually us that people don't like.
