Contagion

Friday is the big day and I'm counting down the seconds. Our house is a complete disaster zone right now and I'm going completely insane. Every where I turn there is either a box, a toy or a McDonald's wrapper (we've eaten enough Mcdonalds to clog our arteries for the next few years...who want to cook when everything is packed away?).

On top of that it snowed quite a bit more than was anticipated. Last time I blogged I think there was 5cm and I think we ended up getting 17inches. So needless to say from the 5cm - 17 inches there has been a lot of mayhem ensuing in these parts. I heard a guy say that this is the most snow that we've gotten in one dump since 1952!? That's pretty lame if it's true. Anyways, because our house is at the top of a 600ft, 45degree driveway, I'm a little nervous about getting this Uhaul truck up without falling over the edge. (Dead serious, there's a 90 degree turn in the middle of this sucker and if you slide in the slightest, you're over the edge...you can see when we invite you over some time)

This could end up being an interesting weekend seeing our gathering is on Sunday as well. Hopefully I don't forget to get anything figured out in the midst of the flurry of events going on. I'm so stoked to hear about all the different people that are saying they're coming back, calling this their church home and inviting their friends who don't go to church. That is what we are all about. I'm not too sure if we can stop people from coming to our church from another church (unless they leave on bad terms...then it's definitely a no go) but that is definitely not a part of our vision. As far as I'm concerned, if people are just transferring over and we're not seeing anyone get connected to Jesus that previously wasn't, something is seriously wrong. Yes, we are on a journey, but at some point the journey without Jesus ends and the journey with Jesus begins. ANYWAYS, (I'm rambling...again) the whole leadership team is stoked.

If you're coming...see you Sunday!

My stinkin' goodness! It snowed here today...around 5cm and it's like there's been an ice storm or something. People are in the ditch all over the place! I'm not sure if it's because people get a little cocky and try to drive like it's 25C outside or whether it's because they are just complete morons and don't give themselves enough room. Whatever it is, people need to relax a bit. It is very different snow than out east in that it's wet and slippery instead of dry and flaky, but still, c'mon!

Despite the crazy drivers, I love the snow! We went out to the house we're moving into on Friday and because of it's elevation there is tons of snow out there. It sits on a 5 acre lot on top of this huge hill. The driveway is between 600-900 feet long and is at about a 45 degree angle. We got to the bottom of the hill and sat there debating if we should drive up or not. ( I didn't want to be known as a stalker, seeing we don't live there quite yet). After a few shots back and forth Bek convinced me to drive up (the first time since we saw it the first time a month and a half ago- you can't see it from the road). As soon as we got to the top and saw the beauty, Bek started freaking out telling me to turn around and go down. I guess she was a little freaked that the landlord would see us. Anyways, snow everywhere!

We can't wait to get out of our place right now. It's served us very well for the last 3 and a half years but it's time. My heart has been in Mission for the last 8 months and now we are finally going out there. Time to get fully immersed into our new life and community!

Just read an awesome post over at churchplanters.com. Here is an exerpt:


" What about a jump into church planting? I talk to guys all the time who are thinking of making that jump. It's like they get to the door of the airplane to jump and they just can't let go. Jumping requires letting go. It requires letting go of solid ground and familiar territory to launch out into the unknown and the uncertain. Jumping requires trusting in something and someone other than yourself. Jumping is risky. Landing can be rough too, and sometimes secondary parachutes have to be deployed. Jumping is always filled with surprises and the unexpected. The landing is never what you expect, yet jumping is worth it. You will never know the thrill and adventure of fully trusting someone and something else apart from jumping. You will never experience your capacity as a human being apart from jumping.

Jumping is an initiation to live more, experience more, and even have a greater impact than you ever expected. Join the elite and jump. Three years ago I had a conversation with my pastor and friend, Shawn, who challenged me to jump. He said something like, "This may not make sense to you or maybe there is no way you can, but I want you to take a jump." At the time I had access to about anyone in ministry, a large office overlooking the lake, a good income with a healthy retirement plan, good people around me, and unlimited travel around the country. That was on Friday. On Tuesday, I walked into my bosses office and resigned in order that I might jump. I'm glad I did.

Why don't you walk into your bosses office and jump. Say these words out loud, "God has called me to plant a church and I'm going to jump. I'm going to do it. No excuses, no guarantees, no nothing, I'm simply going to make the jump." If you don't, you will be talking about it until you are old and gray and then you will be saying something like, "I wish I had jumped.""


I totally resonate with this. I feel like I've jumped out into the unknown but there is no other place I'd want to be. I also had a pretty nice and comfortable job. I may have been able to stay at that church for the rest of my life if I wanted. But comfortable isn't what gets my heart pounding. I have no idea what my future holds. I have dreams. But I have no idea if those dreams are going to happen. We'll move towards them as if they will be reality but in the end, I really don't know. I've come to the point where it really doesn't matter either. I just know that the "bigness" of God has become more and more real over the last few months and knowing the I'm not God is like a breath of fresh air. I can relax and just be who I am.

We are super excited to be moving into our new basement suite. It's everything that we could've asked for. The crappy part is packing everything up. It's so hard to get motivated and then once you get motivated you have to figure out where to begin. We don't move until next Friday but we want to make sure that everything is packed so we can get out and then in all within a small time frame.

So...if you don't see or hear anything on here for a while, you know why. After Friday if you don't hear anything, it's because one of us dropped the computer while moving it!

Next Sunday is our 4th and final monthly gathering. This has been an awesome 4 months. However, the anticipation is killing everyone. Someone asked me if I had to do this all over again if I would do anything different and I think I would. I would go with just two monthly gatherings and launch weekly on the third one. Our challenge was that we were being pushed to start in September and we felt we were ready by then. But we didn't want to start weekly in November, only to have Christmas roll around and kill our momentum. So we decided to stick with the four monthly gatherings.

Our goal was to create anticipation and generate some momentum which we have done really effectively. What we didn't anticipate was the fact that there are so many people looking for a church and to have to wait for so long before it gets going every week sucks. Alot of these people don't go to other churches, aren't Christians or have been disillusioned with the church in the past. They've come to TXC and found a place where they fit and now we make them suffer. The hard part for me is knowing the some people that have committed really need the network of people around them but we aren't in a place to get that happening yet.

Initially I was going to be in Mission in September and we were going to start weekly midweek gatherings of some sort at my house but because that fell through we've had to stay in Abby for an extra four months. That could have been the best thing to happen to us...or the worst. We'll find out once Jan.14 rolls around. Even though there is a possibility that some people might bail, there are a lot of people that are talking about it and getting as amped up about it as we are.

I think our biggest challenge is going to be getting people connected in as participants and not just spectators coming to a church they love. We need people to be the church. this means embodying the mission of who we are supposed to be. It means connecting in to make the few elements that we do have the best they can be. If we don't do this we'll have a few people doing a whole lot of stuff and that isn't my style at all.

Once this move is over and our next gathering is finished it's a long haul until we launch (6 weeks) but I think it's going to be even more incredible than we could have imagined. God has put us where we are at just the right time. We are going to work our butts off and do the best we can but I know that ultimately it's God that draws people to Himself and changes them. We can't change people. We're seeing it happen already and that's what I live for....changed lives.

Do we really know what we're asking for? I want to be patient, humble, a servant. I surrender my life. Do what you want God...it's not about me. Seriously now. If I'm brutally honest, I want to be those things but in some twisted way I want them to benefit me. The war within is so crazy. I really do believe that we want to pursue Jesus but I also know that we really do want to pursue ourselves. We want Jesus to be lifted high but only if we are right beside him. It's the age old question that the disciples had "Who will sit next to you?", "Who's your favorite?" or John..."the disciple Jesus loved". Do you think that got to his head? I bet it did. It got to Peter's. How could someone other than him be the disciple that Jesus "Loved"? I like Peter. He's so stinkin' real that it's as if he shouldn't have been a disciples. He assures Jesus that he will be with Him till the end. Then he abandons him at the crucial time when Jesus needed him the most. He tries to be the hot shot saviour and cuts of a dude's ear just to have Jesus put it back on. He jumps out of the boat as Jesus shows up walking on water (think there was any showmanship inside of him?) and walks for a few feet only to see that he's not in control of the situation and then he sinks. He's the ultimate control freak. He just doesn't seem to fit my idea of a "disciple".

But then again, neither do I.

We lost our internet for a few days after the big storm of '06...we're back up and running now.

Lately, the only thing on my mind is finding a bass player within the next week. Stress is such a stupid thing because it really gets you no where but because we are such control freaks and want to control our circumstances. And for some stupid reason we think that stressing out about it will give us control when in reality it just spins us further out of control and we take everyone around us down as well because we get so emotionally unstable and angry. *Deep breath* Ahhhh.......

So at this point it's looking like an acoustic set by Dave which would totally work out great. I think we have our expectations set on one thing with not a whole lot of flexibility (we have to work on this if we are going to stay planting this church). Dave is phenomenal at what he does and I'd be fully confident that we could pull it off. We'd just need to find a Jambe (sp?) somewhere for Randy to pound away on.

Everyone who's in a house church is probably shaking their heads at me wondering why I put myself through all of this logistical crap and why I feel the need to mic everything and why we do everything that we do...it's just so produced... And I only have one answer...this is what we feel God telling us to do. For sure we have to learn to be flexible within that, but at this point this is where we are heading because it's where we're being told to go. Does it create stress? Yep...self inflicted for sure. But we have to go this way and for now it seems to be working. (As in, people seem to be responding well and getting in on the journey)

For instance, we meet in a theatre for the purpose of removing "The Cringe factor". I can't remember who coined this phrase but it's basically just about removing the barriers that keep disconnected people from ever wanting to connect to Jesus, let alone the church. One lady came to our last gathering that hadn't been to church in a while. I'm not even sure if she's a Christ follower. But at the end I talked with her and she told me that she felt like God was talking to her the whole morning as we communicated our theme in different ways. Then she said something that shocked me and made me smile. She said, "I'm going through some pretty S&%**y stuff right now and that was what I needed to hear". I've had youth swear out loud in conversations with me before, but never with an adult in a Sunday morning gathering before. But she did. And what that says to me is that by us meeting in a theatre, it's one step towards allowing people to be comfortable enough to be themselves. They feel like they don't have to pretend as soon as they pull into the parking lot. In essence, the fish doesn't have to get cleaned up before it jumps into the boat.

That's a huge part of what we are all about...giving the disconnected permission to follow Jesus with us by removing the Cringe factor. Meeting in houses will be the other venue that we use to accomplish this. The two will complement each other. So that was a huge rabbit trail...but welcome to my mind. The whole thing is one gigantic rabbit trail.

There are so many unknowns in the world of church planting that at times, it's just not that funny. When I was in an established church with a somewhat established budget, I could basically do whatever I needed to do (within certains boundaries) and know that if I over spent it would get covered. Now...well...I'm the one covering my overspending (if that makes any sense) A few of the unknowns:

1.) Where are we gonna find a sound man for January? Up until now we've been paying a guy to engineer sound for us just so we didn't have that lurking fear in the background that the sound was gonna suck. He's done on the 3rd and then we are on our own. He may be able to fill in once in a while but definitely not on a regular basis. So ya...what to do.

2.) Where are we gonna find a bass player for the 3rd? This one is a little more urgent and we have followed all of our leads and each ended up as a dead end. We have two weeks and the pressure has the ability to get under one's skin.

3.) How are we gonna finish paying off our sound system and getting enough money to pay for rent as well as the bills that we have accumulated over the last few months?

There just really aren't a lot of answers and trust me, I know all of the right answers like God will provide and just have faith....I tell myself that about every 5 minutes. I'm not writing this in freak out mode...just a fact that church planting is a crazy and psychotic path to take. If I didn't have an extremely clear call from God and that feeling inside of me that if I was to stop doing that that I'd be disobeying in some degree or another, I may have already bailed. But the fact that those two things are in front of me and that the reality that I actually like the feeling of not knowing all of the variables ahead of time in some sick and twisted sort of way, I can still run full steam ahead.

What I remind myself is that this is God's dream. And because of that, he's the one that has to figure out all of the things that are impossible. If impossibility is the open door for God's intervention, then all I can do is wait for God to step in and prove himself. It's seeing this unfold that really gets my blood pumping!

I'm just a noob at this whole church planting thing but I think I've made some amazing decisions so far. If I hadn't made these decisions there's a good possibility that I would be far weaker as a person than I am right now. What I decided to do was surround myself with people that could hold me accountable, that had been where I am and that know more about leadership and church planting than I do.

#1 - Accountability. This has proven to be a very beneficial time for me. If nothing else, it lets me get stuff off my chest that shouldn't be on it in the first place. At times it's a confessional. At others it's an encouragement session. My buddy Dave and I meet every Second Saturday at Timmy Ho's for an hour and a half just to talk. Some people like to have questions that they run through but I've never been very good at the formalities. We just let the conversation go where it needs to go and trust each other to be open and honest with the other. Wouldn't trade this for anything. Half the time we have nothing in particular we need to talk about but just the fact that there is someone there walking with you is a huge encouragement.

#2 - Mentoring. I've been meeting with my mentor for about 5 months I think. We meet once a month and it's the same thing, we just let the conversation go where it needs to. Usually I'm updating him on what's going on and I'm sure that as things start to get hot and heavy with the church that I'll be asking him for tons of advice. This guys name is also Dave and the funny thing is that he was my first principal. Our families parted ways for around 12 years as their family moved away but now we are back and living in the same city again. I think the key for a mentor is that they need to have been where you are now. I don't see a whole lot of value having someone speak into your life that hasn't been there. It's like a computer tech telling a farmer how to farm. Doesn't really make sense. But he's been there. He hasn't planted a church but he's been in one for 12 years where he was the primary leader and had to make a lot of tough decisions. We think alot alike, which I'm not sure is a positive or a negative but so far it's working out great.

#3 - Coaching. This could be quite similar to mentoring for some. I guess it depends on the caliber of your mentor. Now I'm not downplaying my mentors wisdom and what he says about stuff, but he's not trained as a coach. He's more of a sounding board and speaking from experience kind of guy. My coach is a trained professional. At times it seems like more of a professional relationship rather than a personal, laid back conversation but the payoff has been huge. The main way it's benefited me is he has helped me organize my thoughts and develop strategy for seeing processes started. He doesn't tell me how to do, he guides me to the point of me coming up with the solution and him validating it. It's hard at times cause my brain doesn't totally think like this. For instance, I'm just in the dreaming phase of starting up small groups in January and I have no clue where to start. I know what to do but there are so many stinking options of how to do them that it's really hard to know what's right for us. He guided me through the whole process and now I've got a clear understanding of what I need to do and the step that will help me launch these on time. I think coaching is generally quite expensive. I wouldn't know right now because I'm being given this as a gift for right now. We'll see what happens in the new year.

As far as I'm concerned, the first two are absolutely vital. Try walking alone and the sad thing is that we'll probably be watching you fall flat on your face. We aren't meant to walk alone. We aren't designed to know it all. We aren't expected to be strong enough to make it one our own. Surrounding myself with people that are cheering me on to becoming the person that I was originally intended to be could be the best decision that I've ever decided to make.

Let's just say that you went to church without any desire to meet new people. In fact, you avoid meeting new people. Is there any point on you going?

Being a lead pastor has been relatively easy up until this point. We have a gathering once a month. I preach once a month. I have coffee or a meal with people I've met at the most recent gathering. No problems worth complaining about. Everyone seems to be super happy with what's going on...and then we get the call a few minutes ago.

I can't go into all the details but my disillusionment has just been removed. I've encountered a situation in which I am completely helpless. All I can do is listen, encourage and pray. I can't take away the addiction. I can't make the marriage work. I can't make anyone do anything.

The sick and twisted ways of the devil are just that...sick and twisted. The anger I feel towards him is furious...the war that I am in has just been brought to the forefront of everything I do. If what we do as a faith community isn't leading to people being set free, then we may be doing something wrong.

In times like this, prayer is the only weapon I have. I've been exploring spiritual warfare lately and seeing where I stand. I grew up with the belief that it was all around...almost like the "demon under every chair" theology. Then I started to doubt that was the case. But when you are faced with this kind of spiritual warfare, you can see that it is very real and the Devil is going to do whatever he can to destroy the church...low blows and all.


This whole church planting adventure has felt almost like a fairy tale up until now. But this is what I was made for...I am not wired to have a nice little church that caters to the people that sit in the seats to make them feel good. We have a stinkin' massive mission to fulfill and we don't have time for games. People's lives are being ripped to shreds and I can't stand by and watch idly as it continues to happen. When Jesus said that he would build his church and the gates of hell would not stand against it, I gotta believe that what he said is true. I gotta believe that Jesus is building TXC and that we will see the gates of hell blown wide open as Jesus unleashes his power in our city, through us.

This is just the beginning of the war that we are about to see unleashed. As I type this it's almost as if my insides are screaming that it's time to get ready. Start swinging your swords. This isn't a game. Following Jesus is not about you, it's about everyone else around you that isn't following him. There are people screaming out for freedom. They are screaming out for the war inside of them to be silent. They are screaming for Jesus.

Will we take Him to them?

Wow it's been a while since I posted. I've thought about posting everyday but I can never come up with anything to say. I'm sure once we are moving along weekly with our gatherings that this thing will be plugged with posts. But for now, my brain just isn't working properly. I know...it's not showing respect to my faithful readers who just can't get enough of my deeply profound, earth shaking wisdom (boy do I have you fooled!). but that's life. We've been meeting with some really cool people over the last week. I met with the pastor from New Heights yesterday and he is really cool. It was good to just be able to communicate that I am in no way going to be going around stealing people from other churches. It's not that I don't think his people are cool...it's just that we are a church for the disconnected, not the already connected. It was good to just talk and let each other know that we're on the same team. I wish it could be this way with all the pastors.

On another note...who does the church exist for? Some would say it only exists for those who are already saved to build them up and encourage them...I'm not so sure. The next question is "what is the church?" What do you think? I shouldn't add this because it might make you not comment but I'll say it anyways...if there is anything that is going on in a church where making a bunch of Christians feel good about themselves and pumped up is the final end result...it needs to be cut, including Sunday morning.

Well, I'm not sure if I'm a sell out or what, but we've stuck our messages online. You can just download it to your computer by clicking here.



However, I'd venture to say that the easiest way to get it without every thinking is by subscribing in itunes which you can do by clicking here.




You'll have to download the program and then you can subscribe and Voila! To be honest, I can't stand the sound of my own voice. This is more for those in our church that can't be in the gathering than it is to publicize me to the whole world.

We are still having monthly gathering until December 3 and then on January 14 we launch weekly gathering as well as our UnderCurrents (missional sub-communities of TXC). So in January there will be weekly podcasts that will automatically be loaded up to itunes usually the day after our gatherings.

I'm sitting in one of my offices (City Blends...the other one is Starbucks) and I'm thinking about what happened yesterday in our gathering. I'm thinking about all the people that came up to me and said that God spoke to them...all of them in different ways. I'm thinking about how incredible the band was. I'm thinking about how good it feels to preach with no notes so that I can fully engage the congregation. The whole thing was awesome.

I don't advertise us as an emerging church because in all reality I don't know what that really means. If it means progressive, constantly changing, centered on Jesus, viewing ourselves as missionaries in our community...maybe we are. Others would say that to be emerging you have to sit in a circle and let everyone say their piece so they feel like they are contributing to the conversation. (When I said that you perked up and said "Exactly!")

My struggle is this: I've done both extremes. I've done the super traditional approach and I've done the hyper alt-emerging worship approach. I've done the house church approach. I've done the 'Re-Imagining Preaching' approach. And I've come to a conclusion: There is not one approach that fits all. I hear it constantly from the emerging church side that the traditional church has it all wrong and that the seeker sensitive approach is from the devil. Trust me, I've got my opinions on this too...I just try to keep my mouth shut about them cause in the end they don't really make any different except stir the pot. It seems to me that the emerging church is just making what will become the 'new traditional church' and something else will come along saying they are all wrong.

But for TXC, we will just be us. We will do whatever is needed to be done to reach this community. We will be missionaries to our community. We will serve tirelessly. We will give beyond generously. We will meet collectively on Sunday mornings with amazing music and interactive teaching. We will meet in small sub communities where connection with each other can better take place. We will have a separate time for our kids to meet on Sunday mornings where they are engaged with truth that they can understand and that truth will be the same as what the adults are learning. We will function as a sent faith community that does everything we do as a means of connecting the disconnected to Jesus.

So if this makes us emerging, traditional or something in between, I don't really care. The label really means nothing. The question we are asking ourselves is "If we were to, for some reason, have to leave this community in 10 years, would anyone notice?" Would there be people that got connected to Jesus because of us that would notice? Would there be people that we served that would notice? Would there be people that we gave generously to that would notice?

If we are known as a faith community that is contagiously living out their faith and is creatively connecting the disconnected to Jesus...I'm a happy camper...cause in the end..that's what we're all about.

I'm sitting in one of my offices (City Blends...the other one is Starbucks) and I'm thinking about what happened yesterday in our gathering. I'm thinking about all the people that came up to me and said that God spoke to them...all of them in different ways. I'm thinking about how incredible the band was. I'm thinking about how good it feels to preach with no notes so that I can fully engage the congregation. The whole thing was awesome.

I don't advertise us as an emerging church because in all reality I don't know what that really means. If it means progressive, constantly changing, centered on Jesus, viewing ourselves as missionaries in our community...maybe we are. Others would say that to be emerging you have to sit in a circle and let everyone say their piece so they feel like they are contributing to the conversation. (When I said that you perked up and said "Exactly!")

My struggle is this: I've done both extremes. I've done the super traditional approach and I've done the hyper alt-emerging worship approach. I've done the house church approach. I've done the 'Re-Imagining Preaching' approach. And I've come to a conclusion: There is not one approach that fits all. I hear it constantly from the emerging church side that the traditional church has it all wrong and that the seeker sensitive approach is from the devil. Trust me, I've got my opinions on this too...I just try to keep my mouth shut about them cause in the end they don't really make any different except stir the pot. It seems to me that the emerging church is just making what will become the 'new traditional church' and something else will come along saying they are all wrong.

But for TXC, we will just be us. We will do whatever is needed to be done to reach this community. We will be missionaries to our community. We will serve tirelessly. We will give beyond generously. We will meet collectively on Sunday mornings with amazing music and interactive teaching. We will meet in small sub communities where connection with each other can better take place. We will have a separate time for our kids to meet on Sunday mornings where they are engaged with truth that they can understand and that truth will be the same as what the adults are learning. We will function as a sent faith community that does everything we do as a means of connecting the disconnected to Jesus.

So if this makes us emerging, traditional or something in between, I don't really care. The label really means nothing. The question we are asking ourselves is "If we were to, for some reason, have to leave this community in 10 years, would anyone notice?" Would there be people that got connected to Jesus because of us that would notice? Would there be people that we served that would notice? Would there be people that we gave generously to that would notice?

If we are known as a faith community that is contagiously living out their faith and is creatively connecting the disconnected to Jesus...I'm a happy camper...cause in the end..that's what we're all about.

Today was an amazing day! I was almost positive that no one was gonna show up (thanks to that stinking little pessimistic devil on my shoulder) but alas, I was wrong! But it was largely a different crowd this month. There were a ton of people that said their committed to TXC but had already made other plans for this Sunday. So the people that populated the seats were newbies to The CrossCurrent experience.

It is so rad to see people walking out of the auditorium with huge smiles on their faces saying that they felt God speaking directly to them. There was a whole bunch of people that came because one person who has said they were committed to the church invited on friend. That friend then invited two of her friends and all of their kids. The best part about this whole thing is that these people don't go to church and as far as I know, they don't have a relationship with Jesus.

Another couple showed up that have been to a few different churches but have had negative experiences at them. They said they were looking for a place they could just be themselves. Afterwards they were so stoked about everything! He volunteered to help us set up next month and he's hopefully going to be training to do some sound engineering for us.

There are other stories but the beautiful thing about this is that these people are exactly who we are trying to reach...the disconnected. The last thing we want to do is rip people out of a church where they are committed and are serving in. Those people are already connected. There needs to be a place for those who feel like they have no place...that's who we want to be.

The cherry on top was the fact that we showed our Jurassic Fart promo video for our gas giveaway, and everyone laughed. For most of you, that is a pretty funny video...especially with the tag "We've got so much gas...we're giving it away". But in a lot of churches you'd get strung up for showing that in church. This church stinkin' rocks!

This has been a stretching experience so far but this morning was a good reminder that we can't make anything happen. We can do the absolute best that we know how to do, but when it comes to spiritual stuff, only God can get the credit. He knew that we needed someone that could learn how to mix sound...and that dude just may have shown up this morning. He knew we needed to start paying some of our bills off...and those people may just have shown up this morning. That fact is that when I play god, everything gets screwed up. When I let God be God, stuff happens that I never thought in a million years could happen.

Next month is a fresh slate. We are expecting big things as this is our last monthly gathering until we launch full time on January 14. This is just the beginning of God's dream unfolding through us!

Am I nervous? Yep. A little. I always get nervous when I have to speak and then when I get up to speak I settle right in and everything is fine. I used to get so stage fright when I was a kid. Any time I had to talk in front of people was a near death experience. Now I memorize everything I'm going to say. I figure if I can't remember everything I'm going to say, how can the people listening to me. My biggest challenge is killing the rabbit before he bolts down any trails. The best thing about memorizing your stuff is that if you forget something, you're the only one that knows you forgot.

Anyways, it's gonna be a fun time. Here's to hoping that everything is where it should be.

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...we're giving it away!


Here is a sneak peek of the video we're showing on Sunday to promote our Gas Giveaway on December 16. We are asking everyone to pitch in so we can give Mission a Christmas gift from our church. Our minimum goal is to get $2500 and our dream is to get $5000. With that money we are going to go and buy $10 gift cards to the Safeway Gas Bar. And on the 16th we are going to spread out and give away these gift cards to let people know that we love our city and are doing our part to help keep it an amazing place to live.

Thanks to Dave for grabbing this video off of google video and making it communicate the message we are trying to get across.

We had a leadership meeting on Monday night and I capped it off with challenging everyone to dream huge. Sometimes it is so hard to get past the roadblocks in our mind like Finances, resources and reality. And yet, if we don't dream we will always stay right where we are.

A few months ago I was at the gym and got this thought. I don't know if it was God or just common sense (sometimes this eludes me) but the thought was "You're not ready!" And I thought another thought (or responded to God) "You're right!"

Here's the backstory of why I think it could have been God. For the last 3 years I've felt God saying to me "Get ready!" over and over and I thought it had to do with the youth ministry I was leading and then I thought it had to do with the new young adults ministry I was leading. And then I remembered.

In January of 2005, the intern working with me had a dream/vision about me. He saw me standing on a little island in the middle of a raging river (is it a coincidence our church is named The CrossCurrent). On all sides of the banks of this river were doors. He said I've wanted to get off the island but it isn't happening yet. He said "God wants you to know that the first door is about to open" Holy Smokes!

So is the church coincidence or is it a dream of God that he's been birthing for quite a while. Is it possible that those 'Get Ready's' were actually prepping me for this church?

So back to a few months ago. I came home from the gym and started to reverse engineer the church to 1000 people. It's a dream. It requires a lot of money. It includes a strip mall in Mission that is impossible for us to get unless God steps in and makes it happen. It includes multiple campuses in Mission that is an absolutely daunting task and seems impossible without God.

But without the dream, we have nothing to work towards. If we don't dream, Upstream Kids never passes what it is right now. If we don't dream, the worship ministry will never grow to the point of giving us the resources to start up other campuses.

This dream in me is so huge is scares me sometimes. But the fact is that the impossible invites God into the equation. If something is possible for me to do, where is God needed? It's when we face impossible odds (like getting this church even started) when God can step in, do his thing and get all the glory because it sure as heck wasn't the oafs running around trying to be cool. It was God. It will be God. Always.

Starting this church has been a crazy experience. I don't have control over a whole lot of anything and I'm leaarning that it's the hardest but best place to live. I don't know why but I like to have everything lined up in a nice little row and the ducks march when I say march. I like to try and convince myself otherwise but I'm just fooling myself. But just because this is my tendency doesn't make it right.

God must have an incredible time with control freaks like me. Here he is trying to teach me to rely on Him and that he has my best interest in mind and yet I try to hang on and determine the course of my life. And at this point, I've realized that as hard as I might try, I just can't do it. It also leads to a very boring life of predictability and monotony.

I couldn't control the fact that I desperately wanted to move out to Mission in the summer but our rental deal fell through. I seriously wanted to manipulate the whole situation and find us a new place to live but there were no places available. So my hands were tied and Bek and I just sat and waited, not knowing what on earth we would do. And then we pick up the paper and see this place advertised and the rest is history. I was telling our friends last night that I seriously can't believe how this all worked out. Even though we're renting, this is just inches away from our dream home for a price that is just so low it's rediculous. God probably laughed his head off watching us freak out.

I have no control over the finances of this church. You know what really sucks, is the fact that money doesn't grow on trees. It comes from people. And so here we are, this fresh baby church that is wanting to just stabelize our vital signs but the money is off limits because God is in control. He's in control over when we can get enough money to pay off the sound system (By Dec), how I'm gonna get paid and how we are going to fund our Great Gas Giveaway in Dec. But so often I want to control it and make it happen the way I think it should happen. Do it NOW! The drill sargeant in me comes out and then....I get squashed.

I'm not God. Wow. What a concept. And it's so relieving at the same time That reality helps me to relinquish control and just enjoy the adventure It's freaky at the best of times but it is so much fun! I'm coming to the place of realizing that if this church gets off the ground, it's because God wanted it to happen and he was in it the whole way. If it doesn't, we can at least say we gave it everything that we could have possibly given and that God must have different plans.

The future is so uncertain and yet it's known. I can sleep at night knowing that the God of the universe sees our future and has our best interest in mind, whether that looks good or bad to us.

I'm super excited to hear that after coming to one of gatherings people are saying "I would definitely invite (enter said unconnected person) to this!" That is one of our goals for our Sunday gatherings. That the people who come would feel completely comfortable inviting friends who are far from God. Don't get me wrong, we haven't and won't water down anything we say or do. All we are trying to do is eliminate what someone called "The cringe factor". This being the use of insider language, unfriendliness, mispelled words, off tune vocals/instruments, long winded/boring speaking, condemning of sin instead of conviction of sin, not enough signage for guests to get where they need to go....and the list could go on and on.

There is so much stuff that is unnecessary for us to do and yet we do it out of tradition and habit. And a lot of this stuff is what keeps the disconnected from becoming connected. Even though Sunday morning is only one part of what we do, we still want to do our best. It's very easy to settle for second best because we are lazy and we don't want to do that.

One area that we really strive for excellence in is our music. I've talked with a few people in the last couple days and they've told me that at their church the music sometimes gets picked on Sunday morning. I nearly had a heart attack when I heard this! Maybe it's just my personality, but I really honestly believe that the Holy Spirit can lead us what to do a week before the day actually comes. We don't have to wait until the last minute to be "lead by the Spirit". And I'm always open to my plans being hijacked.

Our band practices every Tuesday night until they nail down the songs. So for these monthly gatherings they've been getting a lot of practice. Once January rolls around it will be intense. There is just something about waiting till sunday morning to practice that smells like laziness to me. Or it could be that they aren't learning anything new so they don't really have to practice. Our guys have learned around 8 new songs for the 3 gatherings (including this week) so they've been frantically trying to practice so that we are doing our best.

All of this to say that we believe in trying our very best to do our very best in everything we do. Sure we need to relax a bit and get over our newbie tendencies but that doesn't mean we will let up on being prepared.

Lastly, I just want to make it known that I have nothing against traditional church. I may not understand some of the methods and the reasoning behind them but I am definitely not against them. I understand that they are reaching a certain group of people that our church will never be able to reach. My dream is that I will be able to partner with the churches in Mission to accomplish the goal of connecting the disconnected to Jesus. At times it may appear that we think we've got an edge and one up on other churches in the area because of our approach but I understand that we aren't above anyone and I never want to portray this kind of attitude. We do what we do and the other churches do what they do, but in the end, we all are trying to accomplish the same mission.